Culture: August 2006 Archives

The NYTimes had an article this past weekend about Wedding Fatigue brought on by the inordinate amount of time and money one spends to attend (and gift) the ever increasing number of summer weddings.

Fortunately, Jews haven't (yet) adopted all the pre and post rituals - I still don't understand the purpose of a rehearsal dinner - but even the weddings themselves take time and many, many Sundays. I remember some friends of mine having months of Sundays filled with weddings, along with the occasional mid-week night wedding.

I can see how too many celebrations can become wearying for one person, but I don't understand it when people complain about it especially when you put it in the proper context. In contrast to a wedding, another significant life-cycle event which brings out friends and family is one's funeral. And at every funeral I've attended I've heard people who haven't seen each other in years wish, "only by simchas, only by simchas." So now when we do have the simchas, we complain that it's too much?

I think it's a serious problem when simchas become burdensome as chores. Yes they are a lot of work and a significant expense, but fundamentally, they still have to be simchas. Thankfully, all the weddings I've attended in recent years have been genuinely enjoyable mostly because the couples always understood what was really important in a wedding. Some were more formal, others more lavish, but the fundamental simcha was always an inspiring and noticeable constant.

I don't know if this is a changing trend or if it's just that I've been fortunate to have quality people in my social circles, but in either case I think the attitude adjustment would be most welcome.

A website called Baby Rock Records is selling CD's of "lullabalized" versions of popular music.

Rockabye Baby! transforms timeless rock songs into beautiful instrumental lullabies. The soothing sounds of the glockenspiel, vibraphone, melltoron and other instruments will lull your baby into a sweet slumber.

Presumably the intent is to turn kids into social misfits at the ripe old age of 3 weeks. Here are just some of the bands they've covered or are planning to in the near future:

• The Beatles (no arguments here)
• Nirvana
• Led Zeppelin
• Pink Floyd (with flying pigs on the album art - nice!)
• Metallica
• The Cure (!!!!)
• Tool
• Raidiohead

Apparently Ozzy, Iron Maiden, and the Sex Pistols were too difficult to obtain, but on the plus side, they probably didn't need to put in too much effort to convert Coldplay into baby music.

Seriously though, I like a good glockenspiel as much as the next guy, but the selected audio samples they provide remind me of the old MIDI's only MUCH creepier and eerily hypnotic. Take a listen to their take on Nirvana's Come As You Are (MP3) and Metallica's Enter Sandman (go figure). I'd be very curious to see what long term effects these may have on kids.

Then again, a better question might be if you'd really prefer Rafi.

Weddings are supposed to be happy occasions celebrating the love and commitment of two individuals who choose to spend the rest of their lives together. And yet for some reason, bands play songs which are completely incongruous with the theme of the day, and incredibly they do so often at the couple's request.

AskMen listed 10 Wedding Songs to Avoid where people think these songs are romantic but have obviously never listened to the lyrics. While many Jewish weddings don't usually play secular music in full, every now and again the band will play a riff or two from rock songs just to shake things up a bit. And here too many of the selections can seem a little bit strange.

I first commented on this a while back, and noticed it again at the first wedding I officiated. Since I hear new things all the time I've decided to keep a running list of all the well intentioned but probelmatic songs I've actually heard at weddings. To narrow things down, I'm just focusing on songs in which the lyrics don't fit in with the spirit of the day. For example, while Get Down Tonight might not be the most romantic or subtle song in the world, it still makes sense in its own way. On the other hand, the ones listed below are a little more difficult to explain.

• Live And Let Die
• Od Lo Ahavti Dai
• Mrs. Robinson
• Angry Young Man
• Beat It
• Stairway To Heaven1
• Baker Street - The sax solo doesn't mitigate the song's meaning
• I Will Survive²
• Desperado

I'm sure I'll be adding more in the future - especially if I get married myself.

1. Though in fairness, Robert Plant does refer to Stairway as a "bloody wedding song."
2. For Jewish weddings, note that the "Yiddin" dance fits perfectly.

You might remember the post we did a while back on extravegant Bat Mitzvahs. Today's Fark links to a cameramen's detailed account of the $10 Million Bat Mitzvah held at New York's Rainbow Room last November. Quoth the cameraman:

This wasn't a concert in a restaurant. This was a f-----g arena show tucked into a closet. This was overkill. This was excessive. This was a rich man's fantasy concert, not a Bat Mitzvah.

Hard to argue with the assessment given the entertainment:

• Eagles Don Henley and Joe Walsh
• Stevie Nicks
• 50 Cent
• Tom Petty
• Aerosmith's Steven Tyler and Joe Perry

I can't imagine what her wedding will be like, but if it's also going to be in NYC, I'm available.

You might remember the post we did a while back on extravegant Bat Mitzvahs. Today's Fark links to a cameramen's detailed account of the $10 Million Bat Mitzvah held at New York's Rainbow Room last November. Quoth the cameraman:

This wasn't a concert in a restaurant. This was a f-----g arena show tucked into a closet. This was overkill. This was excessive. This was a rich man's fantasy concert, not a Bat Mitzvah.

Hard to argue with the assessment given the entertainment:

• Eagles Don Henley and Joe Walsh
• Stevie Nicks
• 50 Cent
• Tom Petty
• Aerosmith's Steven Tyler and Joe Perry

I can't imagine what her wedding will be like, but if it's also going to be in NYC, I'm available.

When we last looked at Kosher Delight's health inspection report we found that they failed their 05/05/2006 inspection with 33 points of violations and required a full reinspection.

I just noticed that the reinspection was done on 07/13/2006 with a marginal improvement. KD did pass this inspection scoring 26 violation points - the failing mark is 28 points.

The violations cited are disturbingly similar to what was found previously. In addition to "Facility not vermin proof. Harborage or conditions conducive to vermin exist" and "Evidence of mice or live mice present in facility's food and/or non-food areas" this time we also have "Evidence of flying insects or live flying insects present in facility's food and/or non-food areas" and "Evidence of roaches or live roaches present in facility's food and/or non-food areas."

Kind of makes you want to go vegetarian elsewhere.

When we last looked at Kosher Delight's health inspection report we found that they failed their 05/05/2006 inspection with 33 points of violations and required a full reinspection.

I just noticed that the reinspection was done on 07/13/2006 with a marginal improvement. KD did pass this inspection scoring 26 violation points - the failing mark is 28 points.

The violations cited are disturbingly similar to what was found previously. In addition to "Facility not vermin proof. Harborage or conditions conducive to vermin exist" and "Evidence of mice or live mice present in facility's food and/or non-food areas" this time we also have "Evidence of flying insects or live flying insects present in facility's food and/or non-food areas" and "Evidence of roaches or live roaches present in facility's food and/or non-food areas."

Kind of makes you want to go vegetarian elsewhere.

It seems like ages ago, but we once discussed college rankings, and how YU fared much more poorly by standards other than those used by US News.

On that note, Washington Monthly has a new ranking system aimed at determining the educational value of the universities, a metric which is unfortunately overlooked in choosing a college and nearly impossible to define based on most ranking systems.

But what's missing from all the rankings is the equivalent of a bottom line. There are no widely available measures of how much learning occurs inside the classroom, or of how much students benefit from their education. This makes the process of selecting a college a bit like throwing darts at a stock table. It also means that colleges and universities, like our imaginary mutual-fund managers, feel little pressure to ensure that students learn. As anyone who's ever snoozed through a giant freshman psychology 101 lecture knows, sitting in a classroom doesn't equal learning; knowledge doesn't come by osmosis.

Although there are tests out there to help guage students' collegiate academic progress (CLA, NSSE), most universities apparently keep their results to themselves. So, WM devised their own system which focuses on the university's social impact.

And so, to put The Washington Monthly College Rankings together, we started with a different assumption about what constitutes the "best" schools. We asked ourselves: What are reasonable indicators of how much a school is benefiting the country? We came up with three: how well it performs as an engine of social mobility (ideally helping the poor to get rich rather than the very rich to get very, very rich), how well it does in fostering scientific and humanistic research, and how well it promotes an ethic of service to country. We then devised a way to measure and quantify these criteria.

How does YU measure up? Despite ranking 45 in US News' survey, YU weighs in at an embarrassing 200 of 245 schools.

In fairness, WM's methodology took military and peace corps service into consideration, neither of which are areas which are conducive to perpetuating an Orthodox Jewish lifestyle. Furthermore, many YU students do in fact enter communal service, bet it as teachers, social workers, psychologists, and the occasional Rabbi. However since these professions serve a relatively small and exclusive community, these contributions would likely be overlooked.

Still, it might be nice for Yeshiva University to look beyond the 4 cubits of the Jewish world. Although there have been notable exceptions, most students I've known are either not interested or ideologically opposed to contributing to the non-Jewish world. We've covered some of the drawbacks of taking federal funding, and it might be a nice idea to contribute something to the society at large. Not only would probably help in kiddush hashem and tikkun olam departments, but it may also have other significant religious benefits.

It seems like ages ago, but we once discussed college rankings, and how YU fared much more poorly by standards other than those used by US News.

On that note, Washington Monthly has a new ranking system aimed at determining the educational value of the universities, a metric which is unfortunately overlooked in choosing a college and nearly impossible to define based on most ranking systems.

But what's missing from all the rankings is the equivalent of a bottom line. There are no widely available measures of how much learning occurs inside the classroom, or of how much students benefit from their education. This makes the process of selecting a college a bit like throwing darts at a stock table. It also means that colleges and universities, like our imaginary mutual-fund managers, feel little pressure to ensure that students learn. As anyone who's ever snoozed through a giant freshman psychology 101 lecture knows, sitting in a classroom doesn't equal learning; knowledge doesn't come by osmosis.

Although there are tests out there to help guage students' collegiate academic progress (CLA, NSSE), most universities apparently keep their results to themselves. So, WM devised their own system which focuses on the university's social impact.

And so, to put The Washington Monthly College Rankings together, we started with a different assumption about what constitutes the "best" schools. We asked ourselves: What are reasonable indicators of how much a school is benefiting the country? We came up with three: how well it performs as an engine of social mobility (ideally helping the poor to get rich rather than the very rich to get very, very rich), how well it does in fostering scientific and humanistic research, and how well it promotes an ethic of service to country. We then devised a way to measure and quantify these criteria.

How does YU measure up? Despite ranking 45 in US News' survey, YU weighs in at an embarrassing 200 of 245 schools.

In fairness, WM's methodology took military and peace corps service into consideration, neither of which are areas which are conducive to perpetuating an Orthodox Jewish lifestyle. Furthermore, many YU students do in fact enter communal service, bet it as teachers, social workers, psychologists, and the occasional Rabbi. However since these professions serve a relatively small and exclusive community, these contributions would likely be overlooked.

Still, it might be nice for Yeshiva University to look beyond the 4 cubits of the Jewish world. Although there have been notable exceptions, most students I've known are either not interested or ideologically opposed to contributing to the non-Jewish world. We've covered some of the drawbacks of taking federal funding, and it might be a nice idea to contribute something to the society at large. Not only would probably help in kiddush hashem and tikkun olam departments, but it may also have other significant religious benefits.